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Keeping Your Cool During Christmas Break

Learn this game changing tool.

The holidays can be stressful enough even without having children underfoot 24/7. It is easy to lose our cool. The more stressful life is the more likely children are to act out.

We regret things we have said or done when we lose it. And if done often enough, our relationship with our children can become disturbed and cooperation goes out the window.

During our parenting course, “Redirecting Children’s Behavior,” learning how to keep our cool is one the most sought after tools in our courses.

One extremely effective way to keep our cool is a method we call, “Pause Before You Parent.” Our knee jerk reactions often include yelling, threatening, punishing and bribing. You are not alone if these sound all too familiar.

In the heat of the moment, we get focused on their behavior rather than how the child is feeling. We take their behavior personally instead of learning how to identify and meet their needs.

“Pausing Before You Parent” allows you to get centered. From that centered place you will be able to use more effect methods to redirect their behavior. During the pause, you may want to try one of the following centering techniques: Breathe deeply, start singing, count to 10 backwards, pray, tag in your partner, or leave the room for a few minutes.

Once you are centered, here are a few powerful questions to ask yourself:

  • What do I need right now?

  • What does my child need?

  • What do I want to create?

If you are having trouble with the last questions, here are somethings you may want to create:

  • emotional safety

  • understanding

  • trust

  • connectivity

  • fun/laughter

  • a learning experience

  • feeling heard and empathized with

Learning to “Pause Before You Parent” sounds so simplistic, but if you are not using it, it can be a game changer for everyone. Plus, you are modeling self-control for your children. I hope this helps and your Holidays will be filled with connection, good food, lots of laughter and Rest & Recovery!

Happy Holidays!




The new edition of the "Redirecting Children's Behavior" book is now out! Click here to order your copy on Amazon or Kindle. There are a ton of new materials to help you discipline in a way that connects you and your child during an altercation. Wouldn't you rather that than you and your child walking away feeling empty, frustrated or angry?


Kathryn Kvols

Author, Lecturer, Parenting Coach

(352) 494-1581

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