3 S's Of Successful Parenting
Self-Reflection - Most therapists and coaches tell us it is impossible to change someone else.(Lord knows I have tried in vain many times!) This road only leads to frustration and disappointment.
What if people treat you the way you teach them to treat you? For example, if your child is disrespectful, you may be doing something to perpetuate it. That’s a hard pill to swallow! Unfortunately, we can only change ourself. Self-reflection is one key to successful parenting. So if your child (or spouse) is behaving in a way you don’t like, ask yourself, “What is one thing I could do differently?" For example, one idea is to walk away the minute you sense disrespect. This road leads to freedom and empowerment.
Self-Acceptance - It is self-defeating to self-reflect and then “beat yourself up" about being a not “good enough” parent. It is imperative you say something light-hearted like, “Wow, I blew that! I wonder what I could do differently next time?” If you really want to change your unwanted patterns, laugh at yourself and know it is human to make mistakes. Being hard on yourself will only slow the process of change down.
Self-Care - It doesn’t matter how many brilliant books on parenting you have read or how many courses you have taken. All of that good knowledge will “go out the window” if you are not taking care of yourself. I am sure you have heard the adage, “If Mamma ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy!” It is so true! I am more irritable, less fun to be with and snarky when I don’t take care of myself. Twenty minutes to yourself a day will usually do the trick.
At the end of the week, check yourself and see how did I do with these three things. If you did well, pat yourself on the back. If you didn’t do well, determine what you will do differently next week.
For more tips like this, go to this link to find a Certified Parenting Educator who teaches "Redirecting Children's Behavior" parenting course near you.
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