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How Not to Raise an Entitled Kid

Ten-year-old Amy's job is to clean the bathroom. She gets frustrated after giving little effort and says, "Why should I have to clean the bathroom, it's not fair!"

Jason's job is to mow the lawn. He's got a test to study for and Dad is tempted to let him off the hook because Jason is not doing well in that subject.

Sound familiar? The pressure you feel from your children may cause you to feel confused and insecure about your parenting. There are many compelling reasons why we are soft when it comes to our kids. We're often tempted to want to be their friend instead of their parent. In addition, it is uncomfortable to deal with the backlash we get from our kids when we stick to our values and the pressure to not have your kid feel different from their friends sometimes gets in our way. Here are 20 ways to prevent raising entitled kids:

20 Ways to Avoid Raising an Entitled Kid

  1. Quit telling them they are special to avoid the need to be treated special.

  2. Stop worrying about them...they need your trust, not your worry.

  3. Don't allow them to talk back when you ask them to do something.

  4. Have them replace toys they break.

  5. Even if you child is super busy, have them do chores that contribute to the whole family.

  6. Have them earn or work for as many things as possible.

  7. Give them a budget for their clothes. If they go over budget, have them earn the money.

  8. Have them get a job at 16 or earlier.

  9. Don't make special meals for them.

  10. Don't let them off the hook when it comes to taking responsibility for their actions.

  11. Don't let them negotiate everything....let them know you are the parent.

  12. Make sure that if they borrow money, that they repay you.

  13. Teach him to manage their own screen time.

  14. Make sure they finish the task....don't do it for them.

  15. Teach them how to manage their frustration levels.

  16. Do not allow disrespect.

  17. Give them time, not things.

  18. Teach them patience.

  19. Help your children understand that "hard" is good and that "waiting" builds character.

  20. Ask them for three things they are grateful for before going to sleep each night.

Parenting is Not for the Feint of Heart!

You may be thinking, "This is a lot of work!" One of the things most people don't tell you about raising children is that while you are busy building their character, they are busy building yours. I agree, it is very time consuming. But I can assure you that if you don't take the time now, you will be making up for it later. You and your kid will be grateful in the long run.

Parenting Practice - Check off the things you need to work on with your child from the list above. Work on one thing until you achieve success and then work on the next one. Be careful to work on only one thing at time to avoid frustration for both you and your child!


Parenting can be quite the challenge. It is always good to have new tools in your "parenting tool box." Want personal coaching and problem solving solutions? Sign up for a FREE 15 Minute Strategy Session. We will pinpoint an irksome behavior and plan a strategy for resolving this issue.


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Kathryn Kvols

Author, Lecturer, Parenting Coach

(352) 494-1581

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